Pain as a friend

Angelina Jolie has a tattoo that says in another language 'that which does not kill me, makes me stronger'. In the book You Matter More than You Think Dr. Parrott states:

'Ultimately, the pain we carry in our hearts is the grinding stone that
shapes us to love. It sharpens our capacity to be tender with another's wounds
and to empathize without judgement.'

She goes on to say:

'It takes the sharp edges of our personalities and slowly smooths them into
a person who can be tender with another's wounds.' And then finally 'Because of pain, you make a difference. Pain will give you permission to
walk into places you've never dreamed you'd enter, and it can change your
relationships like no other else. Pain, your personal grinding stone, has a
purpose whenever it is used to make a difference.'

We try so hard to avoid pain in any form don't we? None of us would choose to endure pain, yet it is there for a reason. For our good. To make us stronger, better women. To help us better love others and eachother.

Pain comes in lots of forms though, doesn't it? Harsh words. Dreams delayed or maybe deferred. Cross country moves, growing teenagers, children's health issues, marital strife, aging parents or grandparents (or maybe just aging), personal health issues, financial complications. The pain you experience, even if it is the same problem, will not be the same pain for me. How we experience pain will effects us each individually. Hopefully however we process the pain it will cause us to become more like Christ. More loving, merciful, graceful, patient, kind, self-controlled, joyful, and faithful. So many turn, even if it is just for a time or season, to be bitter, sharp, cold, curt, or judgmental. I certainly have done this. But I want my first response to be better.

When I get squeezed from the pain of life I want what comes out to be good. I am afraid what in reality does come out a lot of the time is the realization of my own sin nature. The nasty selfish, self pitying part. It seems I am not so unlike my children. I need the pain of life to teach me lasting lessons. The rod of discipline before I turn from myself. The Bible says

'The Lord disciplines those He loves'

and much of the time that discipline takes the form of some kind of pain. But I need it. So I guess pain really can be a friend.

I think we may need to seek professional help

Our Internet service was down yesterday until late morning today. It became obvious that we all enjoy the computer maybe a bit too much. Emma and I both commented that we felt disconnected from the world.

In other news I finished the book 90 minutes in Heaven by Don Piper. What an amazing story! Emma also finished a book, one that she got at the Library yesterday! 400 pages none the less! So you can see that we did a lot of reading without the computer.

...and it has made all the difference.

God is so good! Today He has given me a practical application to my last post. Needing to work on my discontentment, which is really just the sin of ungratefulness, He has shown me how to work on this. I love practical applications. God doesn't show us sin without helping us deal with it.

So as I am reading my chapter 'The Power of a Good Attitude' this week in >The Power of a Positive Mom, Karol Ladd suggests that we keep a gratitude journal. So my twist on this is when I find myself with a bad attitude about a person or situation I am going to write down my grief, and then write whatever positive things I can.

For example:
Negative:
The neighborhood kids are always at my house, sometimes twenty at a time.
Positive:
*They like our family
*We have the opportunity to show them Jesus.
*They feel comfortable here.
*We get to really know our neighbors.
*We have seen some accept the Lord through our kids.
*Since there are so many families that rent in our 'hood, our time with these families is limited. Time is of the essence.
*Our kids have lots of friends to play with.

You get the picture. I am excited, encouraged, and challenged to do this until my attitude has a significant change. I am hoping to see an overflow in my children too. Please hold me accountable girls, oops did I really say that? ;o)

The Road Less Traveled...

I took the road less traveled by and that has made all the difference.
Robert Frost


On a whim the other day at Costco I picked up
You matter more than you think; what a woman needs to know about the difference she makes by Leslie Parrott The title and pretty cover caught my eye. This is a struggle that I continually cycle through. Does what I do day to day really matter? Most of the time it seems to me that anyone could do what I do, and probably much better.

I usually steer away from the Message but I thought this was good.
Make a careful exploration of who you are and the work you have been given, and then sink yourself into that. Don't be impressed with yourself. Don't compare yourself with others. Each off you must take responsibility for doing the creative best you can with your own life. Gal 6:4&5 The Message
In the NIV it says in verse 5 'each one should carry his own load'.

Creative best? What is that? The author goes on to say 'We do our creative best with our lives whenever we set out on a consciously chosen course of action that accents the good of others.'

I thought this was good too: 'The road less traveled is ultimately found in the heart. It's found in the heart of every woman who wants her life to make a difference and realizes that the difference is found, quite simply in love.' And also this: 'Geography has little to do with the difference you make. What matters is that you are making the best use of your life by loving the people in it.'

I think what God is trying to teach me in this is that MY road less traveled is a completely different road or journey than anyone else's. It is less traveled because it is only my road. My road consists of people and situations that He puts before me. My family certainly, but also others. My neighbors (not yours), even though our friends may be the same my relationship and how I love them will be different than how you do. This is my road, my journey. By loving them well, that makes all the difference.

I remember talking with Jamie about our individual journeys one time. She made it sound so simple to let each one live their own journey. Travel their own path with the Lord. Not try to make my journey yours or vise versa. Of course she said it much more eloquently than I could ever. But the thought has stuck with me.

I want to enjoy my journey on this road less traveled. Not envy your road or covet the flowers you have lining your path. If God has given me, created for me, this particular road I should be satisfied with it. Not wanting to change course or scenery. But sometimes I do. I need to work on that. Contentment.

This and That

I bought two pairs of shorts yesterday in hopes that it will someday soon be warm enough to wear them. I am so ready for some warm weather. I think I will spread on some self-tanning lotion in anticipation. ;o)

Since I am just getting by day to day and am not looking to far in the future I realized yesterday that my kids needed FIVE cereal boxes to take to a science class today. I had one on hand so I sent Ron to get cereal after work and told him get whatever is cheap. He brings home CoCoa Crispies and Fruity Pebbles, 2 boxes of each. The kids are in heaven. It did make me feel good when Evie said she had never heard of these before.

This video is really cool. It took me a minute to figure it out. Enjoy!

The words of this song is the prayer of my heart for the past several years. Hopefully at my funeral someday y'all will say that it really did characterize my life.

I get so distracted with things that really don't matter at all.